A quiet yet hectic fortnight past

The past two weeks have been non-stop last-minute wedding plans. I'm in-between handing touristy pamphlets to my parents for sightseeing around Dover, printing programmes for tomorrow's ceremony, and eagerly awaiting information on when my best man is arriving in the area after his night in London. All the while, the future Mrs. Missouri Expatriate is most deservedly sleeping in after another late night at work. One major disadvantage to planning a wedding on 6½ weeks notice: work schedules don't budge as easily.

So tonight marks my last night as a figurative free man. And more likely than not, there will be a belated tribute to Arthur Guinness (as last night was the 250th anniversary of the creation of Guinness – brilliant!) tonight, coupled with a nervous sleep at home and the possible sneaking-in of Mizzou Football's game at Nevada tonight (which kicks off at 2 am UK time).

All the while, the stench of Kirkcaldian absurdity has skyrocketed the past fortnight. His attorney general, the Baroness Scotland, has been fined £5000 (roughly $8500) for hiring a housemaid from Tonga unable to prove her right to work in the UK, under a civil law pushed through the House of Lords by the Baroness herself two years ago. Now comes the Telegraph today claiming, alongside plugs for their book due out in high street book stores this November, No Expenses Spared, saying that the guys who tipped the paper off about the claims of duck moats, gardening bills, potentially fradulent mortgages, and Sky Sports subscriptions were military soldiers taking on extra jobs during their time off so that they can have extra money to buy bulletproof vests and their families' Christmas presents.

I'd lambast about this, maybe dismiss any last remote chance of Gordon Brown pulling off a Truman '48, but we're about to deliver the helium for our wedding balloons to the evening venue. (Oh, and if you really want that book now, you can shell out an extra three quid and buy it directly from the Telegraph.)